# You Know you are a home shop machinist When



## Tin Falcon (Jul 15, 2007)

You know you are a Home Shop Machinist when?  I thought I would start this thread and see where it goes. The responses can be self observations, humor, or aspirations. Every hobby, occupation and pass time has it rites of passage what are they for the HSM?
Well here is a start.
You know you are a HSM when.
Your Christmas present to your wife was made on your lathe and she loves it.
The work island in your kitchen is a work bench from Home Depot and the wife picked it out. 
*Your family finds metal shavings in the rug of the living room.*
You find the plastic bushing on the shower door worn out. So you made new ones without even checking the hardware store for replacements. 
Your coffee table book is an  Enco Catalog
Your toddlers booster seat is an old MSC catalog. 
You would rather spend time in the shop instead of watching TV unless How it is Made or Modern Marvels is showing. 
Family vacations consist of attending the Cabin Fever Expo & Iron Fever Expo Model engineering shows. (.GEARS, NAMES, ,NEMES, Etc can be substituted.) 
You think it is normal to spend a half hour and buy a $5.00 tool to make a part or tool you can buy for two bucks.
You have to move layout tools, drawing tools and model engine sketches off the dining room table at meal time to make room to eat. 
the dust critters you pull out of corners are wearing chain mail armor.
... the photos you carry are of model engines or other projects you made.
.. the family finds swarf in their socks. 
... the kids Christmas presents are machinists tools or tool box.
the sales person at the hardware store ask you what the purchase is for. When you tell them they still do not understand. 
Well enough from me your turn!! 
Regards 
Tin


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## rake60 (Jul 15, 2007)

......
Your accustomed to washing your hands BEFORE you pee.
Your wife finds a chip in her bra.
When your the first person the neighbors show what they just broke. :roll:
When you catch yourself fondling the part you just finished. For an HOUR!


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## olcowhand (Jul 16, 2007)

..........when you won't leave the machines to go pee!.....till it hurts!


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## wareagle (Jul 16, 2007)

...when your Christmas list includes raw stock.
...when you find yourself trying to improve the design of (insert item here).
...when you are excited that there is "some assembly required".
...when you have just spent two hours and have nothing to show for it other than a pile of chips.
...when someone refers to the bible, and you immediately think of the Machinery's Handbook.
...when you spend three weeks and several hundred dollars to make a tool that could have been bought for $50 at the local hardware store.


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## Cedge (Jul 17, 2007)

Your wife complains that the cat always smells of cutting oil... and you've never noticed.

You've used "steel blue" layout out fluid to color the kids' easter eggs.

You still mumble, but now it's in 4 decimal places.

You have to sort your pocket change outside, to keep the chips out of SWMBO's carpet.

Your wife takes you to her manicurist..... as an act of revenge on the nail technician. 

Everyone in the family checks your shirt for splinters before giving hugs.

Three words... blue polka dots.


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## Tin Falcon (Jul 28, 2007)

....when you take your teen to summer camp and plan side trips to your favorite metal/tool supplier along the way. 
Tin


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## rake60 (Jul 28, 2007)

When you know you'll be traveling past a Grizzly Showroom and forget to
put the back seats back in the mini van after cleaning it up for thr trip.


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## shred (Jul 29, 2007)

...When you go on a business trip to Seattle and have to check your carry-on luggage on the return because it has 45 lbs of Boeing Surplus aluminum blocks in it.


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## BMyers (Aug 1, 2007)

When a fun Saturday event is going to HGR's sidewalk sale


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## Tin Falcon (Aug 1, 2007)

B: What is HGR
tin


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## BMyers (Aug 1, 2007)

"What is HGR ?"
http://www.hgrindustrialsurplus.com/


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## Tin Falcon (Aug 1, 2007)

Largest Used Industrial Surplus Showroom in the Galaxy!
that explains it!!


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## Tin Falcon (Aug 14, 2007)

... every time you make something you take a photo of it and post to your favorite HSM forum
Tin


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## Tin Falcon (Apr 19, 2009)

OK Guys I know this is an ancient thread from days gone by but think it is a classic and deserves to be seen by the more recent members here. Hope you enjoy it and maybe add to it. 
Tin


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## zeeprogrammer (Apr 19, 2009)

Mom! Mom! I'm a machinist!
Look! Look! It says so right here!

I'm so happy...
Oh...I gotta go...I'm so excited.


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## kvom (Apr 19, 2009)

When you surf the tools section of Craigslist at least once a day.


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## Metal Butcher (Apr 19, 2009)

The first thing you do in the morning is grab a cup of coffee and go visit the shop! :big:

-MB


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## websterz (Apr 19, 2009)

...the Salvation Army no longer accepts your donations because all the screws have been taken out.
...you eyeball the kids clothes and have them mentally sorted into rag boxes before they outgrow them.
...you have more than 5000 of any given size SHCS.
...the neighborhood Spring Cleanup is a treasurehunt for free materials.
...your buddy the trash collector has ever left anything interesting for you that he found on his route. (Happens to me all the time!)
...you can look into a box of taps and know all of them without reading the shank.
...you don't have to look up the tap and clearance drill sizes for those same taps.
...your wife finds carbide inserts in the washing machine.
...your kids have their own safety glasses and don't need to be reminded.


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## John S (Apr 19, 2009)

...you visit an old cathedral and realise the internal buttresses were made for line shafting.

JS.


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## mu38&Bg# (Apr 19, 2009)

kvom  said:
			
		

> When you surf the tools section of Craigslist at least once a day.



I thought i was the only one doing that. I have a bookmark with my search criteria that I click every time I click the HMEM bookmark.


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## ChooChooMike (Apr 20, 2009)

... when you sign on to HMEM 1st thing in the morning - every morning


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## gbritnell (Apr 20, 2009)

You know you're a machinist when: You can figure how to make the proper divisions on a dividing head, on paper, and not have to look in a machinist book. 
You know you're a machinist when: You can chase threads on a lathe, up to a shoulder, without breaking into a profuse sweat.
You know you're a machinist when: You can tap 5, 0-80 holes in a piece of aluminum knowing you only have one tap. 
You know you're a machinist when: You take your finish cut and it actually comes out to what you wanted.
You know you're a machinist when: You have to make a deep cutoff in the lathe and you don't jam up the cutoff tool with swarf and make the back side of your part look like someone cut it off with a chisel. 
You know you're a machinist when: You can sharpen a drill evenly enough so you can get 2 curls coming off the flutes and the hole doesn't end up .025 larger than the drill.
You know you're a machinist when: You spin your engine over with the new flywheel you just spent 4 hours making and it runs so true you can't tell if it's turning at all.
OK I'll give someone else a chance.
gbritnell


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## shred (Apr 20, 2009)

dieselpilot  said:
			
		

> I thought i was the only one doing that. I have a bookmark with my search criteria that I click every time I click the HMEM bookmark.


What? no Craigslist RSS feed direct to your e-mail client?? ;D


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## zeeprogrammer (Apr 20, 2009)

Mom! Mom! I'm NOT a machinist!
Look! Look! It says so right here!

These people are all true machinists.

I'm a wannabe...cannabe?...gonnabe?...

But not nowabe.

Oh...I gotta go...I'm so bummabe.


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## mu38&Bg# (Apr 20, 2009)

shred  said:
			
		

> What? no Craigslist RSS feed direct to your e-mail client?? ;D



That's a good idea. Fixered.


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## Loose nut (Apr 21, 2009)

When you think you can make use of a broken center drill,
When you think that just one more quick change tool holder will be enough,
When you go to work in a freezing shop in winter and your not getting paid for it.


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## Mainer (Apr 21, 2009)

...you spend 4 hours fixing a cheap 3-hole paper punch, even though you already own a much better punch that works fine, and you'll never use the punch you fixed, anyway.

(Any resemblance of this activity to what I've been doing for the past two days is purely coincidental....) ;D


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## 90LX_Notch (Apr 21, 2009)

You go to one of the biggest car swap meets on the east coast looking for machinist and machine related tools.

Everyone tells you your nuts for building your latest project. (Cannon for neighbor.)

You're thinking of selling off all your high performance auto parts to buy better/more machine tools.

You don't mind the metal chip that is embedded in your finger.

You start to realize that you are becoming a hoarder of "junk" because one day you might be able to make something from it.

You read pre WWII books to learn all that you can about manual machining.


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## mu38&Bg# (Apr 21, 2009)

90LX_Notch  said:
			
		

> You go to one of the biggest car swap meets on the east coast looking for machinist and machine related tools.



You mean you didn't go looking for garbage camshafts to scrounge for piston rings? ;D

Greg


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## the engineer (Apr 22, 2009)

the wife birthday pressie and she loves it sachs rotary engine centre polished and painted now she wants the fan turned into a barometer 

View attachment clock2.bmp


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## websterz (Apr 22, 2009)

Loose nut  said:
			
		

> When you think you can make use of a broken center drill,
> When you think that just one more quick change tool holder will be enough,
> When you go to work in a freezing shop in winter and your not getting paid for it.



They make great boring bars! I used one just last night. :bow:


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## marcel beaudry (Apr 22, 2009)

http://www.stormpages.com/dimitrios2/Machining/Machinist.html


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## Maryak (Apr 22, 2009)

When you ask the dentist for old burrs, drills, buffs, picks and scratched mirrors. ;D ;D

Best Regards
Bob


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## steamer (Apr 22, 2009)

Maryak  said:
			
		

> When you ask the dentist for old burrs, drills, buffs, picks and scratched mirrors. ;D ;D
> 
> Best Regards
> Bob



When you ask the dentist where they got their really nice magnifying optics that mount convienently on their glasses and where to get them....as they are cleaning your teeth...... ;D

...... everybody knows you use broken drills for boring bars!......don't they?... :

Dave


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## Bernd (Apr 22, 2009)

.............after sex instead of a cigarette you head for the shop and finish that part you started.


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## websterz (Apr 22, 2009)

Bernd  said:
			
		

> .............after sex instead of a cigarette you head for the shop and finish that part you started.



After what? Sorry...guess I spend too much time in the shop. :big: I actually kept a straight face while typing that! ;D


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